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Ibara Mayaka: Uuhhh…… Unhhh…… Ahh, I’m so nervous, what should I do?
Chitanda Eru: He will most likely accept it.
Mayaka: Chii-chan, that would be good, but…… if only……
Chitanda: But Mayaka-san, was there any other reason why Fukube-san did not accept your chocolate last year?
Mayaka: Any other reason? What do you mean?
Chitanda: There is the possibility that it was Fukube-san’s etiquette regarding chocolate. I mean, don’t you find it strange? If I was Fukube-san, I would have accepted the chocolate at that point in time last year.
Mayaka: Really?
Chitanda: Yes, Mayaka-san is so cute, so there is no reason to refuse.
Mayaka: Er, t-thanks, but……
Chitanda: Fukube-san is a complicated person, so I think he has all sorts of inner conflicts, but I still cannot comprehend. To reject a confession from such an adorable, lovable girl!
Mayaka: Ah, thanks, I suppose?
Chitanda: Moreover, the problem might have been the chocolate itself. If it was some other hand-made gift, Fukube-san would have accepted it without any objection.
Mayaka: I see…… Some other hand-made gifts, huh.
Chitanda: According to a relative, boys don’t really like sweet things, so you don’t have to focus on chocolate. Just like the dog days of summer1, it is a tradition that someone decided on their own.
Mayaka: Mm, you’re right.
Chitanda: Moreover, it doesn’t even have to be food. As long as you put your heart into it, anything is fine.
Mayaka: I see.
Chitanda: Based on what we’ve just said, let us think of an item that Fukube-san would be happy to receive.
Mayaka: Uhhh…… Fuku-chan, as you know, is broad-minded and shallow. It’s difficult to pin down his preferences.
Chitanda: What about his hobbies? He likes cycling, right?
Mayaka: He’s quite a fanatic of bicycles.
Chitanda: Then you should give him a hand-made bicycle!
Mayaka: Bicycle…… Wouldn’t that be too difficult? Of course, there are people who like to collect parts and construct their own bicycle, but……
Chitanda: Mayaka-san, you don’t have to consider if it is possible or not. First, we should think about what would make him happy.
Mayaka: Ah, hm…… You’re right.
Chitanda: Do you have any other ideas besides a bicycle?
Mayaka: Let me think…… He has a smartphone, so how about a new cover?
Chitanda: Good idea! Anything else?
Mayaka: How about a new drawstring bag?
Chitanda: That’s also a great idea! Any more?
Mayaka: Uuhhh…… Any more…… I think that’s all I have.
Chitanda: Please think further! We need something that can immediately take a tight hold on Fukube-san’s heart!
Mayaka: Even if you say that, I can’t think of anything else.
Chitanda: Then, let us consider from Fukube-san’s way of living. Is there anything that Fukube-san secretly hopes for somewhere in his heart?
Mayaka: Fuku-chan’s hopes? Hmm…… come to think of it, he seemed to want to beat Oreki-san during the Cultural Festival.
Chitanda: What do you mean?
Mayaka: Fuku-chan has been secretly minding about not being able to hold up to Oreki. He can’t stand always looking up. I understand the feeling.
Chitanda: If that is so…… then all we have to do is to prepare an item that will help him defeat Oreki, right?
Mayaka: Really?
Chitanda: If that’s the case, then we will have to prepare…… platform shoes! Give Fukube-san a pair of platform shoes and win over his heart!
Mayaka: No, that’s not it! Definitely not it!
Chitanda: You think so? Fukube-san loses to Oreki-san only in terms of height, right?
Mayaka: Chii-chan, that’s some really mean things you’re saying!
Chitanda: Haah…… I suppose so. I apologize. Should we consider his academic results, then? If you could produce a set of reference books and practice books by hand, and give that to Fukube-san……
Mayaka: I also don’t think that’s right. Anyway, if reference books can raise grades, no one would have a hard time with their studies.
Chitanda: Indeed. Then it should be something for fighting power. Make some brass knuckles and give them to Fukube-san!
Mayaka: As I said, Fuku-chan isn’t interested in that kind of thing!
Chitanda: Then how about a hand-made spiked bat?
Mayaka: That’s wrong.
Chitanda: Hand-made illegal firearms.
Mayaka: Why does the killing potential keep increasing?!
Chitanda: Hand-made nuclear bomb.
Mayaka: Chii-chan!! Be serious!!!
Chitanda: Sorry…… I could not think of what areas Fukube-san wanted to beat Oreki-san in……
Mayaka: Ah…… I’m also confused. What should I give Fuku-chan?
Chitanda: Then, list down all the things we have talked about in a notebook.
Mayaka: ‘Kay.
Chitanda: There are ten items including the chocolate. And for some reason, I happen to have a ten-sided die. Roll this.
Mayaka: Eh? Why do you have an item for TRPG2 enthusiasts?
Chitanda: When you have a dilemma, dice is the answer. Just roll it.
Mayaka: Uh, alright. (Rolls die)
Chitanda: That’s decided, then!
Mayaka: Eh?!
Chitanda: It’s fine. I shall assist you, with the backing of the Chitanda clan.
(School bell rings)
Oreki Houtarou: The sleet has stopped. I guess I’ll go home. Come to think of it, I wonder if Satoshi received chocolate from Ibara.
(Door opens)
Chitanda: Oreki-san!
Oreki: Chitanda?
Chitanda: Oreki-san, this is terrible!
Oreki: What happened?
Chitanda: The nuclear bomb…… Mayaka-san’s hand-made nuclear bomb has been stolen!!3
Oreki: (Just how should I retort to this statement?!)