(Telephone rings)
Oreki Houtarou: Oreki residence.
Chitanda Eru: Hello, this is Chitanda. Sorry for calling you during your break.
Oreki: Mm.
Chitanda: I apologize for being so sudden, but do you have any plans for the day after tomorrow?
Oreki: Nope.
Chitanda: That’s great. Erm, Oreki-san. I understand that this is sudden and troubling, but could you please help me hold a drum?
Oreki: Hold a…… drum?
Chitanda: That’s right.
Oreki: I don’t really understand……
Chitanda: Sorry, I’m bad with explanations…… Erm, basically, a shrine near my house is holding a Samba1 carnival.
Oreki: Samba carnival?!
Chitanda: Yes.
Oreki: Samba at…… a shrine?!
Chitanda: That’s correct.
Oreki: Samba in April?
Chitanda: Yes, although it is cold.
Oreki: Why Samba?
Chitanda: Oreki-san, please stop saying “Samba” over and over. I’m also quite embarassed.
Oreki: Oh, could it be that you’re……
Chitanda: Yes, I have taken the role of Samba queen at Mizunashi Shrine’s Samba Carnival for the last few years.
Fukube Satoshi: (Panting)
Ibara Mayaka: Fuku-chan, wait for me!
Satoshi: Ahh, a cherry blossom blooming out of season! Let’s stand over there, Mayaka!
Mayaka: Fine. Anyway, I never knew that Mizunashi Shrine held this kind of festival.
Satoshi: Really? It’s quite famous.
Mayaka: I mean, why Samba at a shrine? Wouldn’t you expect something more dignified?
Satoshi: Ah! There’s a reason for that. Originally, before the war, Mizunashi Shrine celebrated the “Living Doll Festival”. After the war ended, at GHQ’s2 behest, it was changed to a Samba carnival.
Mayaka: So why Samba?
Satoshi: Mayaka, do you not know MacArthur’s famous words? “I like Samba!”
Mayaka: I think you’re definitely lying.
Satoshi: Anyway, after that, Mizunashi Shrine would hold a Samba carnival every year. Gaudy costumes and cheerful music, as well as extremely passionate dancing! This shrine even won a Nobel prize in Samba near the end of the Showa era!
Mayaka: What’s with that unnatural-sounding prize?
Satoshi: Ahh! They’re here! The Samba procession!
Mayaka: Ignoring me, huh.
(Crowd cheers)
Mayaka: Oh! It’s really starting!
Satoshi: This is amazing, Mayaka! Those women wearing flashy, flowery outfits that look fit to burst are shaking their bodies while moving towards us!
Mayaka: Yeah, even when it’s so cold.
Satoshi: And the one in the center is…… Chitanda-san!
Mayaka: C-Chii-chan?!
Chitanda: Viva! Amigo!
Satoshi: That’s an insanely huge flower decoration! And a sparkling micro-bikini! The queen’s appearance is just stunning!
Mayaka: She wears that every year?!
Satoshi: And that person beating the drums behind is…… Houtarou.
Mayaka: Oreki?!
Satoshi: He looks regretful, doesn’t he?
Oreki: (This isn’t good. Not good at all.)
Chitanda: Um dois três3, um dois três, um dois três!!
Oreki: (No matter what, I probably shouldn’t have come here. I don’t want to see Chitanda. I don’t want to look at Chitanda. If I look directly at Chitanda while she’s wearing that glittering Samba-style outfit, while she’s moving her body energetically, while she’s shouting something like “Obrigada”4, with all that gaudy make-up, what would happen……?)
Chitanda: Seja bem Vinda, Kamiyama!!!5
Oreki: (Enough of this. I want to go home!)
Chitanda: Obrigado amigo~!
Satoshi: Wait, what? This is the final track?
Mayaka: This isn’t even an intermission!
Chitanda: How did it turn out this way? I’m curious!
Oreki: Then you can stay curious forever. In any case, many thanks!